1 Voice

It is no secret. Communication is the foundation of every relationship. And, more times than not, our family does not have a reliable communication floor. 

To me, communication is like an invisible, security laser web trap with criss-cross paths and different level variations; one must fully understand to dodge around to successfully get to the vault. It's complicated. It's messy. It causes us to blame, throw [adult] tantrums, form tears, and abrupt goodbyes. 

Why?

Because more often then not, the conversations we think we are having are not the conversations we are having.

Because we are so afraid of hurting someone or making someone else feel uncomfortable, we don't voice our truth in a clear, honest fashion.

Because we are interrupted, disputed, or shamed before we have the chance to get our point out, so we shut down, stop trying, or believe we are crazy for feeling the way we do.

Because we have been bombarded with all the "right" ways to talk to our special someone, we confuse ourselves with trying to be polite, trying not to project, and trying to use all the "I" statements. We lose our connection to our feelings and neglect our voices!

When did talking become so hard?

In our intimate relationships, we are in trouble for not saying anything and then in trouble for bringing things up. We are the "cool and easy" partner if we disconnect from our needs and the "difficult" partner if we ask for what we want and need. Wanting to be "cool and easy" we let too much go and then one day wake up with the realization hitting us smack in the face, WE ARE NOT HAPPY. Then we go on a rampage of relationship cleaning, giving ultimatums, finding all the reasons why you are not the right fit, and what happens? You fight, you leave, you cry, and all of this could have been avoided if you only knew about 1Voice.

With our young kids, they talk too much, and our teens not enough. Where is the balance? How do we embrace the interrupts and still get our point across? How do we pull information out and build deeper connections? How might it look to have collaboration rather than silos in the home?

In our world, at our jobs, on social media, there are so many voices. We often try to put our voices out there, but no one hears us, so we stop, or we are terrified even to try so we don't.

How do we build our confidence in communication? How do we allow our voices to be heard? How do we make sure our children know they have a voice and feel valued? 

 We start at home. It all comes down to 1 Voice.

At Bayne, this is our number one effective communication strategy, 1 Voice. 

The video describes and demonstrates the method. 

The takeaways from this practice and why it is effective is within the relationship you establish three things. 

1. 1 Voice is a safe place.

 Every member of your family needs to feel like they will not be judged, ridiculed, punished, or hurt for the asking to be heard.

2. 1 Voice is about respect.

When your family or partnership has a 1 Voice moment, it is respected. Do not deviate. When your kids interrupt you, you practice and model it over and over. They will see it's importance when they start to benefit from it too. This is no joke.

3. 1 Voice is not abused

Mocking this method will only hurt your connection. It is not something to overuse every day. It is to be used for deeper conversations to ensure active listening and allow for emotional clarification. 

Effective communication will change your parenting game.

This is a high-level overview. It doesn't do it justice.

If you want to communicate effectively within your family home, eliminate frustration, and minimize disruptive conflict, your best investment will be the 1Voice 12-week at-home course. Your home needs to be a respectful, safe, creative place to enhance your dream family life. Imagine what it would be like if your partner opened up more if your conflicts had quick solutions, and every member of your family can express freely, openly, and constructively. Imagine feeling confident with your voice and your ability to convey meaning and ideas with astonishing clarity. Invest in your communication, invest in your world, invest in your dream family life today. Check out the 1Voice program.

Send a message to [email protected] to learn more.